Did you know that every Christian family has disagreements? I want to bring to your Knowledge that conflict in marriage is inevitable but it can be resolve in many ways.
The couple that never has conflicts does not exist. Unfortunately, conflict can lead to bad fights. A bad fight is one that seriously alienates husband and wife but never resolves the cause of the problem.
As a result couples build up bitterness, quarreling, uncontrolled anger, hatred, and often divorce, violence and abuse.
As a believer careful thought will convince you that serious marriage conflict is not God’s will for you. God created marriage for the good of man and woman.
He never intended for marriage to be a source of hatred and bitter grudges uncontrolled anger, hatred, and often divorce, violence, and abuse.
On the other hand, the good news is that there are best ways to resolve conflict in marriage.
As you are reading this post am sure you want to know the best biblical ways to resolve conflict in marriage.
Top 10 Best Biblical Ways To Resolve Conflict In Marriage
Here are top 10 best biblical ways to resolve conflict in marriage
Now, one of the best biblical ways to resolve conflict in marriage is to focus on the problem, not the person. As a Christian couple be willing to address the situation even if you know it is going to be uncomfortable.
Avoiding it will not make it go away. If your spouse overreacts, keep calm. Gently direct it back to the problem. Don’t escalate it further.
So, this is one of the best ways to resolve conflict in marriage.
2. Control Your Temper
It will interest you to know that as a believer you can easily be upset when an issue is not quickly resolved. Resolving problems sometimes can take a long time, but with gradual improvement it can be resolved amicably.
As a child of God you are expected to control your temper because people are looking up to you. Also, know that you are different from the world system of marriage.
Don’t give up. Don’t expect that you or your spouse will change overnight. Give it time. Don’t make snap decisions.
Don’t think that you must reach a final decision the first time a matter is brought up. Take time for you and your spouse to think about what has been discussed.
If your initial discussion doesn’t lead to a solution, ask for time to think about it. Promise to discuss it again later. You are more likely to reach a rational conclusion, and your spouse will know you have taken the matter seriously.
According to Proverbs 15:1 it states A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Don’t allow your temper to make you lose your objectivity and resort to hurting your spouse. Anger is not necessarily sinful, but it must be controlled so it doesn’t lead to sin.
3. Be Humble
Being humble is being strong to accept whatever challenges that comes in the marriage.
Humility means accepting the truth that you are not always right, and that others have something to offer. This is an important concept found in a Godly marriage, and other relationships.
Philippians 2:3-4 states “Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others”
Humbleness in godly marriages leads the couples to listens to each other, admits mistakes, accepts criticisms. A humble husband and wife never lacks peace and they both learn everyday due to the will to learn.
If you humbly allow your spouse’s best interest to take first place, there’s grace from God to work things out. A humble husband or wife reveals the true nature of a reborn spirit during times of controversy.
4. Be Honest
Honesty is the foundation for trust in a relationship or marriage, and trust is necessary for a relationship to function and thrive.
When couples are always honest with each other, it tells them that they can trust one another and the things they say to each other can not be heard outside.
Honesty in a Godly marriage boosts the following
- Promotes healthy communication
- It creates respect for each other
- It encourages acceptance
So in a Godly marriage honesty is a great norm and a cherished value. Godliness in the marriage will always encourage the truth to be spoken.
One of the best biblical ways to resolve conflict is when you change your attitude towards marriage. On the other hand, know that you can not change your spouse.
I want to bring to your knowledge that you can only change yourself. So, if you have an addiction, anger issues, or any other unhealthy behaviors, address it.
Ask God to show you any blind spots in your life. Changing yourself will force your spouse to have to change the way he or she interacts with you.
6. Be Gentle
It will interest you to know that being gentle in a Christian perspective can be seen as showing care, kindness, and respect in the manner that you act or speak to others.
So, harsh words and negative attitudes build up anger which can lead to divorce. Gentleness demonstrated in posture and language makes your spouse feel safe.
Safety brings out openness, love, intimacy, honesty, and transparency because there isn’t fear of retribution.
So, even when there is a conflict couples should endeavor to be gentle to one another. Knowing that gentleness should be a fruit in the marriage.
Prayer is one of the powerful tools in which you can use to resolve conflict in marriage. If you want your marriage to be blissful you must present your marital challenges before God at the place of prayer.
So, it is one of the most essential ingredients to resolve marital conflicts. The bible states in Philippians 4:6,7 – Don’t be anxious, but by prayer and supplication make your requests known to God.
Christians should do this for all their problems, but specifically for our marriage problems. If you have proper faith in God’s power, then you will pray diligently about your marriage problems.
When you have conflict in your marriage, especially serious ones, you need to believe that God will answer your prayer.
If both the husband and wife are faithful Christians then they should spend much time together and individually praying for God’s help and intervention in their marriage.
So, God answers prayer if your family faces serious problems be bold to present it before Him it will be resolve.
8. Be Wise
The bible states in Proverbs 24:3 “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established”. Wisdom is the application of knowledge from the word of God.
I want you to know that any marriage that lacks wisdom is bond to fail. When husbands and wives seek God’s wisdom in a conflict, there’s renewed hope for restoration.
So, it is expedient as a believer to apply wisdom when necessary in other to avoid conflict and have a blissful marriage.
Do you know that no matter how hard two people try to love and please each other, they will fail? With failure comes hurt.
One of the greatest key to maintain an open, intimate, and happy marriage is to ask for forgiveness and grant it quickly. The ultimate relief for hurt is the soothing salve of forgiveness.
So, the ability to do that is tied to individual’s relationship with God. However, through the act of your will, you let your spouse off the hook.
Jesus said, in book of Matthew 6:14–15 “For if you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions”
Now, forgiveness means giving up resentment and the desire to punish. On the other hand, as Christian couples you do not forgive each other under duress, scratching and screaming in protest. Rather, you do it with a gentle spirit and love.
10. Doing Things Together
As a Christian couple one of the best biblical ways to resolve conflict in marriage is by doing things together. It is good for both couple to share things in common.
Doing things your own way can end up in a disaster if your spouse has a genuine concern about something. So, family’s that stays together stick together.
God wants both the husband and wife to do things together so as to make a sound decision. If you think you don’t need your spouse’s input, you are making a big mistake.
From the above points there is hope for troubled marriages. The Scriptures provide us to all good works, including how to solve problems in our homes.
So, it is possible to solve your problems God’s way. If you do not do so, you have no one to blame but yourself.